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Santa and Banta were both fanatics about deep sea fishing. Each would come back from fishing trips, and tell the other big lies about the number, and sizes of the fish they caught.

So Banta comes back from his latest fishing trip, and tells Santa...

"You wouldn't believe, but in Bahamas I caught a 500 pound Herring."

Santa says...." That's nothing, last time I fished in da Bahamas, I pulled up an old lantern from a sunken American ship.... and the candle was still burning !"

They both looked at each other, knowing that the other was lying.

Finally, Santa said to Banta, "Look Banta, if you take 450 pounds from off your herring.... I'll blow out my candle !"
A man got a call from unknown number.
Girl: Hi, are you single???
Man: Yes, but who are you ???
Ans: Your wife.... Aaj Ghar Aana Tab Bataoungi...

Another call from unknown number...
Girl: Are you married ??
Man: Yes, but who are you ??
Girl: Your girlfriend,... you cheat!!!
Man: Sorry baby, I thought it was my wife.
Ans: Wife Hi Hoon Kamine, Aaj Tu Bas Ghar Aaja.