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A salesman, who getting ready for his next trip, asks his wife to include a condom in his suitcase. His wife instantly asks, "Why???"

He replies, "Just a reminder of the bad things out there, in case I want to try something different."

She grabs a bar of soap, drops it into one of his socks, swings it in the air, and WHAM !!!! swings it up between his balls..... After much pain, and gathering his composure, asks.... "Why the hell did you do that?"

She replies, "Just a reminder of the bad things out there, in case you want to try something different."
A young man in a public swimming pool was startled when his swimsuit fell off. He was in the deep end, and couldn't find it, no matter how desperately he looked. Perplexed, he went to the shallow end and tried to figure out what to do. As he stood there up to his chest in water and watched the young ladies in their bikinis, he was additionally stressed to realize that he now sported a raging hard-on.

Finally, he struck up a course of action. He jumped violently out of the water and shouted loudly, "Mad dog! Mad dog!"

Although most of the others in the pool began screaming in fear, a lusty redhead took a more direct course of action.

She tore off her bikini bottoms, flattened him on the ground and straddled him yelling, "Quick! Let me muzzle that son of a bitch before it gets away!"
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